Audience of One

I wrote this piece on last year's "Live it loud" experience, and all I could say was that it was an amazing experience! I couldn't exactly express how I felt about it, but I knew it was great. I've had a year to think about why that was, and here's what I've come up with:
  1.   It had been so long since I had heard doctrine that sound and for that amount of time (almost 4 days of non-stop goodness!) oh my goodness!
  2.  I like to think of myself as a turn down kind of person, but it turned out that all I needed was my kind of turn up; live it loud provided that and more.
  3.  It was a road trip and mini vacation in one! Those are two of my favorite things.
  4.  I think amidst all that excitement, I ate the word but somehow didn't digest it. So I tasted it, knew that it was great, but it didn't do much to my body. So it ended there and I couldn't even point to what I remembered from the whole conference. 
This is so easy to do you know? In the excitement of hearing the word go down and realizing how deep it is and enjoying it, it can be easy to forget to let it sink. Thankfully, there were videos and I was able to re-watch them.

This year, I had less distractions. It was such an expensive trip that I had been preparing both physically and spiritually long before the program. I went with an expectation to somehow deepen my walk with God after this conference. There's been a hole of some sort in me that just wasn't getting filled by anything I did. I'd forget about it when I did adrenaline-filled activities, like planning for a trip, dancing to Spanish music and going on road trips, but it was still there. At some point I said I'd get married (lol) and that companionship would fill it. But as I sought to figure out things to do with my time to create less down time and possibly fill the void, I found like minded people and mentors. Anyway, things got better as I decided to step things up a notch with God instead of complaining about feeling like not much had changed since becoming a Christian. If it were easy I guess you wouldn't need the Holy Spirit.

During this year's "Live it Loud" conference, I let the things that needed to die die, buried them somewhere between Ottawa and Vancouver, and I'm gradually resurrecting.  I've decided to just seek God and remember that all other things shall be added on to me. As He pleases of course, which kind of includes His timing. Sigh. So now it's one day at a time, one more minute spent with God, one more decision made with God's interest at heart, one more ungodly habit dropped and just one opinion that'll count.

I hope this encourages someone to re-focus his or her attention on God. Just God and nothing else.


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